Ideally, self-love means loving yourself unconditionally with all your flaws and shortcomings. It means valuing your own happiness and mental wellbeing and knowing your worth. That means that you don’t compromise your wellbeing to please other people.
Loving yourself seems easy, and it should be easy. However, we live in a world where we are often slapped with ‘you are not enough’ comments. As a result, most of us are always in a constant struggle to prove ourselves to others.
While you can’t be able to shut down such critics, you can slowly cultivate self-love and eliminate the need to find validation from others.
Here are 5 things you can do to love yourself better:
1. Commit yourself
You can’t be able to start the journey to self-love unless you admit to yourself that this powerful force has been missing in your life. Before anything else, evaluate the areas in your life that need yourself to value and respect yourself more. Ensure that you are honest with yourself when doing this. The more you feel that you have been failing in this aspect, the more zealous you will be to start and complete the process. Being honest with yourself can be truly beneficial to your mental wellbeing by truly addressing the issues that have been weighing you down at the back of your head.
In addition, analyze why you think self-love is important to you. This way, you will be able to make an emotional connection to the journey.
Remember that every goal calls for total commitment if it is to succeed. Likewise, the journey to loving yourself requires you to make that commitment to yourself. Don’t try bringing in excuses for areas that you feel you can compromise. Once you start the journey, don’t let anything or anyone be a hindrance.
2. Free yourself
The journey will be much lighter when you cut off anything that has been weighing you down over the years. The truth is that you can’t be able to love yourself fully if your heart is filled with anger and resentment. To create a space for love, you need to empty your heart of these things.
If you have been angry with yourself for mistakes that you did in the past, start by forgiving yourself. If there are people that wronged you and you have never let them go, it is the high time that you do that. Forgiveness nurtures your mental wellbeing and is a fundamental factor when it comes to your self-love journey.
In addition, if you are surrounded by toxic people and habits, they are likely to hold you back in your journey. No matter how hard it is, cut off everything that doesn’t add value to your life.
3. Start practicing self-love
Practicing self-love means that you are on top of your emotions and everything that happens to you. It means claiming the power to create the change that you want to see, be it higher self-esteem or better mental wellbeing.
If you were saying yes to everything to please other people, start saying no if something is beyond your limit. Start shutting down critics with words of affirmation to yourself. If you have been waiting for others to appreciate you, start appreciating yourself. Give yourself gifts rather than wait for others to give you. A gift such as a personalized photo pendant necklace allows you to own something that is customized for you, unique to only you, and gives you the chance to reflect on what you want to commemorate with this necklace that honors your journey to self-love.
4. Build a healthy circle of friends
As one of your endeavors to love yourself, let go of what’s been weighing you down, and start filling the void with everything good. Surround yourself with positive people who will uplift you and help you change your perspective about life. In addition, hang out with people who will love, respect, and value you. That means that they fully accept you and respect your decisions. In that case, not only are you at peace with yourself but you also surround yourself with people that encourage your self-love journey and mental wellbeing improvement.
Of course, such relationships can’t be formed in a day. Give yourself time to open up to others, but also give others time to open up to you, and don’t settle for any less than you deserve.
5. Make daily commitments
The journey to loving yourself and establishing your mental wellbeing can be overwhelming. If you are not committed, it is easy to fall back to where you have come from. Promise yourself love, respect, and healthy habits every morning and make a commitment to pursue them throughout the day. It is these daily efforts that will culminate in a lifestyle of self-love eventually. I know this is easier said than done, but you can also find motivation in knowing that there are many other people out there with exactly the same struggles. When I started my self-love journey, it was tremendously inspiring to be surrounded by success stories and even the stories that embodied all the discouragement, hopelessness, but most importantly the unwavering will and commitment to give yourself the love you deserve.
Getting to a point of self-love is not a one-day affair. On the contrary, it is a process that will require time and effort. There are some things that you will struggle with- especially forgiving and letting go of things and people you were used to. Accord yourself the patience needed to walk the journey.